Day: April 14, 2014

Fake Love, Fake War: Why So Many Men Are Addicted to Internet Porn and Video Games

Orgasm without intimacy. Adrenaline without danger.  Sounds like the perfect ingredients to emasculate men.

Check out this great article about what some are pointing to as the “Demise of Guys.” This is something every guy or parent of boys should really consider.  How proactive are you at protecting your yourself and your boys from falling into this trap?

“Let’s teach our men to make love, and to make war . . . for real.”

You know the guy I’m talking about. He spends hours into the night playing video games and surfing for pornography. He fears he’s a loser. And he has no idea just how much of a loser he is. For some time now, studies have shown us that porn and gaming can become compulsive and addicting. What we too often don’t recognize, though, is why.

In a new book, The Demise of Guys: Why Boys Are Struggling and What We Can Do About It, psychologists Philip Zimbardo and Nikita Duncan say we may lose an entire generation of men to pornography and video gaming addictions. Their concern isn’t about morality, but instead about the nature of these addictions in reshaping the patten of desires necessary for community.

If you’re addicted to sugar or tequila or heroin you want more and more of that substance. But porn and video games both are built on novelty, on the quest for newer and different experiences. That’s why you rarely find a man addicted to a single pornographic image. He’s entrapped in an ever-expanding kaleidoscope.

There’s a key difference between porn and gaming. Pornography can’t be consumed in moderation because it is, by definition, immoral. A video game can be a harmless diversion along the lines of a low-stakes athletic…